Being Grateful Does Not Mean Sticking Your Head In the Sand

A friend of mine recently posed this question on his social network news feed:

"I think people have begun to confuse being "thankful" for a favorable situation as a "physiological out" for not questioning the social structures that have caused such injustices that allows for there to be such suffering as suggested above in the world. We are not more fortunate because “God loves us.” Good fortune must never quench a good person’s thirst for justice. One is not ungrateful if they look about, and seeing suffering poverty in the absence of their own, ask why these conditions exist and demand that they change. Are we really to "Shut up and dance?

I am not saying that thankfulness is wrong and its expression is offensive. But I do think it rather odd that people think their own success or good fortune is reason to forget the rest of the world and “defecate like you ate a seven course feast."

I understand my friend's irritation at such an attitude--I find it a little irritating, too. I know far too many people who are happy to "shut up and dance" in their happy little fairy land, where there is no war, strife, or any significant amount of crime or serious poverty (yes there are places in the world like this, and I am fortunate to live in one at present).

But being grateful isn't about success or good fortune. Being grateful is about acknowledging that our very existence is a miracle, and understanding that means we can then be generous with whatever we do have (no matter how little), and give of ourselves from a sense of abundance (even if we are poor).

To be grateful is not to deny the evils of the world. Expressing gratitude does not preclude working to eliminate the evil. But to respond to evil with anger and violence (physical or verbal) is to give more energy to the evil.

That's what Gandhi and Martin Luther King were trying to teach us with passive non-violence: we speak up about the evil that is happening, we refuse to participate in it or cooperate with it, but to be angry about it and violent (physically or verbally) is to feed the evil.

Being grateful is the way to find peace in that passive non-violent response: yes, there is evil in the world; yes, I may suffer as a result of it; but I will suffer less if I look around and see that the evil is not as powerful as the good, because I give it no power in my own life.

Mother Theresa had this attitude about it: "I was once asked why I don't participate in anti-war demonstrations. I said that I will never do that, but as soon as you have a pro-peace rally, I'll be there." Mother Theresa was a powerful woman who changed the world, without anger.

It's all about where you choose to spend your energy. Here's an old story about the same: "A Native American elder once described his own inner struggles in this manner: Inside of me there are two dogs. One of the dogs is mean and evil. The other dog is good. The mean dog fights the good dog all the time." When asked which dog wins, he reflected for a moment and replied, 'The one I feed the most'."--George Bernard Shaw

Why feed the evil when we can just as easily feed the good? And for those who say that doesn't work, look at what Gandhi did; look at what Martin Luther King, Jr. did; look at what Mother Theresa did. They changed the world. We can change the world too, without being angry all the time (which doesn't work anyway), and while being grateful for all the good we do see around us. Despite the evil in the world, life is good, and I am grateful for all who are working for positive change in the world.